The Coin Standing Upright

The week was like the rain. Under it I left myself doing nothing, and the undying rhythm of falling water over the roaring and howling winds did its job of drowning me away from over-thinking, and washing away the flecks of trouble that would’ve probably mutated into something mossy and infectious.

And now that I’ve left it, the sun was bright and the warmth gratifying. Somewhere there might’ve been a rainbow.

I’m about to write something that I put off writing for the whole week. I did it because I didn’t know if I could write it. Something told me that I should leave it be, and I left it. And then the week picked up and things went so hectic it felt like the week was one whole, long day.

Now things had settled down, and in a way I’m glad of how busy things went. It felt refreshing, kinda. And now I sit in front of this and the words come.

I guess I did the right thing.

On the Sunday which was the first day of Hari Raya, the Dog Marley passed away.

He was poisoned. That’s all we know. He was poisoned by someone, or some people, with a heart made entirely of dark, stinking shit. I curse that person. I curse them. For whatever malicious intent they did it for, they deserve a similar death. I wish they die alone. I wish their deaths a painful one. They deserved this.

If there’s only one consolation, it was that we were all there beside him when he passed. The whole family. We stayed and waited with our hands on him. I hope that had helped somewhere.

Numbness. No disbelieve. I think I’ve accepted it earlier on. But it pained a lot to come home and see the cage empty, and knowing I can’t call him to come and ask for a kiss, and get that wet lick on the face. Or wrestle that toy away. Or get him to go “Up!” and clamber all over me.

It’s a memory now. Another picture in the hall. One that I’ll see when I walk backwards. I’ll most likely do.

Bob Marley once said that “Love will never leave us alone.” I just need him to know that he never left us, and we will never leave him, and home is always where he belong.

I said it once that day, in a whisper. I write it down now.

Home is always where you belong.





*********

Life’s a coin toss.

Flip it. Call it. Heads, you win. Lady luck and all that jazz. Tails and the world shows you the barren wasteland, and treats you with a glass of radioactive water. It’s all luck. It’s all either good or bad.

But sometimes you get that toss that landed wrongly on the floor. Wrongly because it stood upright. You get one face of the grim reaper with a beckoning finger and a chainsaw and you get the other face of Mona Lisa over the plains of Ida.

Both the good and the bad. And then, that side of the coin that made it stand. The one that neutralised things out. Call it a draw. Everybody loses. Everybody wins.

The bad face of the coin was Marley. The good face of the coin is Lanna giving birth to twins.

Children of the Rastafarian Pup.

I’m one of the happiest man right now. It’s something out of a movie. It’s that feeling of knowing that at the end of the road, there’re new ones. You know that saying. With Death comes Birth.

He left, but he left something behind.

It’s still early; Lanna gave birth this morning and puppies have a shaky first week where things can go wrong. I can only pray, and hope truthfully that they’ll do good. I have my trust in Lanna, but I would like the trust of Fate. And Fate never gives. He only shows.

But golly.

TWINS!

There, I got it out. I’m about to internally combust with the elation.

You hear that, Marley? You see this? You got twins, big boy. You got TWINS.

Watch over them, aights?

*******

There’re a bunch of other things going on, both like the upright coin; a two-sided culmination of good and bad. I’ll write about it some other time.

I’m leaving this last section of the post here to thank a few people. These people were the same people that got some sort of circuitry break in their brains, which ended up turning them into brilliantly insane people (but greatly lovable all the same).

These people are the gang I call friends. And they’ve helped even if some of them didn’t know that they did.

The Monday after Marley passed I wasn’t sure if I wanted to get out like we planned, but I knew I would’ve ended up moody in the room and playing games to drown the thoughts, so I trusted them to cheer me up, give me a good time, and they did it without fail, like they always do.

So here’s to friends; my utmost, greatest, most sincere thanks, for being there and helping me even if you guys didn’t know it. And for those who noticed, somehow, even if I thought I hid it well, thanks for understanding and caring.

Thank you. You guys don’t know how much you’ve helped.

Thank you.